If you have a child diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder (ASD) then you’re already intimate with the challenges of raising a child with autism. It’s overwhelming to parent as it is, then add on the everyday responsibility of caring for a child with autism and you may feel like you’re on the road to burnout. As this article plainly puts it:

“For parents and caregivers, sleep issues deepen the stresses they may already feel managing the needs of a child on the spectrum on top of life’s other demands.”

Be easy on yourself. You’re not naturally an expert in autism; but you can take steps to tackle big issues one at a time. While we’re not experts on autism or parenting, we can help you in an important area where the two of these merge, and that’s sleep.

Autism and lack of sleep

As you may already know, autistic children struggle to fall and stay asleep. In fact, between 40 to 80% of children with ASD have difficulty sleeping.

Not getting enough sleep impacts a child’s developmental health and wellbeing. And considering the challenges for children with autism in their social, emotional and communication skills—a night of restorative, deep sleep is even more critical.

Inadequate sleep can quickly become an unbearable cycle to break free from: the behaviours that are preventing your child from sleeping are heightened if they don’t get enough sleep.

A lack of sleep will result in the following behaviours: 

  • Aggression

  • Irritability

  • Inattention

  • Hyperactivity

  • Physical aggressiveness

Essentially, sleep deficiency brings out the worst in your child on the spectrum. This is likely to have a snowball effect in your house—it could deepen your worry and stress. As a result, you don’t get enough sleep, your partner doesn’t get enough sleep and you hit a wall with everything.

It’s not surprising then, that this study revealed how parents of children with autism sleep less and reported poorer sleep quality. That’s why knowing the root and solution to your child’s sleep issues can be beneficial to your overall health in addition to theirs.

Signs that your child is having sleep issues

You’ll probably quickly notice the behavioural characteristics mentioned above but it might be hard to differentiate between a bad day and a deeper rooted issue in your child’s sleep cycle. Here are some other signs you can look for to better discern if your child isn’t getting enough sleep:

  • Bedwetting

  • Night terrors

  • Snoring

  • Restless sleep

Why do children with autism struggle with sleep?

The truth is, there’s still not a lot known about the connection between autistic children and issues with sleep. The medical problems that commonly trouble people on the spectrum include: anxiety disorders, ADHD, gastrointestinal distress and seizures – which need medications that can disrupt sleep.

Beyond concrete medical issues, there are other reasons that children with autism might struggle with sleep and it’s large in part due to the symptoms of being diagnosed on the spectrum. This includes:

Communication and difficulties with social cues:

Children with autism have a more challenging time communicating and picking up on social cues. This means that even if they see other people winding down and getting ready for bed, they may not pick up on it.

Routine and habits:

Children with autism find comfort in their routines because it helps them cope with their surroundings better. So if you break free from a regular bedtime routine or have them go to sleep in a different place, this could upset them and make them less likely to go to bed happy. They need to feel like they have some control.

Favorite objects:

Some kids on the spectrum have objects or associations that they obsess over. So if they don’t have access to the object they associate with bedtime (such as a stuffed animal or PJs), they’ll be unable to settle in effectively.

10 tips for getting your autistic kid to sleep

Rest assured that helping your kid get a quality night of sleep is not out of reach. Once you know how to approach bedtime then you can definitely make a difference, both in their sleep and your family’s life. Here are some approaches to help your child sleep better:

1. Manage pressing medical problems

If you’re trying to get your autistic child to sleep or you notice several of the aforementioned signs, the most important thing to do first is manage any immediate medical concerns. Talk to your child’s psychologist or developmental pediatrician to address any pressing medical concerns such as sleep apnea, anxiety, or seizures.

2. Set consistent sleep and wake times

Choose a reasonable bedtime when you know your child will be sleepy and stick to it. This also goes for the time that they wake up. Keep a consistent schedule so their body naturally gets in the habit of falling asleep and waking up.

3. Create a positive bedtime routine

Routines are useful for human beings, autistic or not. But as we mentioned earlier, autistic kids are extremely fond of routine, and have trouble adapting when a routine changes. Also, if you establish a bedtime routine with positive rituals associated with going to sleep, they are more likely to know when it’s time for bed.

It’s important to keep this routine consistent every night and to do activities in the same order every time. It might help to have a checklist that your child can follow and check off once tasks are completed to give them a sense of accomplishment. Ideally start this routine around 30 – 45 minutes before it’s time for them to shut their eyes.

4. Incorporate soothing activities

This is up to what your child enjoys and finds relaxing. Maybe it’s reading a story together, taking a warm bath, working on a puzzle or listening to soft music while brushing their teeth. These are all quiet activities and what works for one child may not work for another. As long as it’s something peaceful and your kid looks forward to it.

5. Incorporate physical activity during the day

Exercise is important for everyone, but especially for supporting your child on the spectrum. It’s shown to not only improve anxiety and stress levels, but it will help increase melatonin production, which is needed to regulate our sleep-wake cycles. Increasing your child’s physical activity level will help them use more energy which will help them to fall asleep faster at night.

6. Cut back on screen time

It’s important to remove screens after a certain point to make space for a proper winding down period in the evening. Whether it’s watching a TV show, playing a video game or using a smartphone, it will rev up your child’s energy where you want the opposite to happen.

7. Give your child notice when bedtime is approaching

Your child might not fare well if you decide it’s time for bed abruptly in the moment. So before you transition into their bedtime routine, it’s important to use some sort of cue consistently that gently warns your child bedtime is approaching. Maybe you direct them to look at the time or you use a special word. Whatever it is, use a cue that you can do from anywhere.

8. Use pressure touch

This is also known as deep pressure touch—a form of physical touch that involves using downward strokes to gently massage, stroke, cuddle or hug someone. Pressure touch is known for being an effective calming strategy for individuals with autism, anxiety, hyperactivity or other special needs. If your child is receptive, try including this in their regular bedtime routine.

9. Create a relaxing sleep environment

Make their bedroom a happy, peaceful, safe haven. This can be through soft, playful bedsheets, their favorite stuffed animal, cozy pajamas and a glowing nightlight. Other environment tricks include a weighted blanket, a white noise machine to block other sounds and of course, a comfortable mattress. Check out our roundup of the best mattresses for kids.

10. Always gently return your child to their own bed

It’s important that your child sleeps in their own bed and falls asleep on their own. If they demonstrate anxiety about falling asleep alone, you can try using a reward system or a certain threshold of “free passes” where you stay in a chair next to their bed until they drift off (but you need to be very firm and not do this too often).

Otherwise, you can make them feel safe by wrapping them in a weighted blanket or playing soft background music. If your child does wake up in the middle of the night and comes to you, calmly return them back to their bed and then step away. It’s important that they get into a habit and associate falling asleep without you present.

Conclusion

Take care and be rest assured that decent sleep is completely attainable for you and your autistic child. It might take some trial and error and some patience but you’ll get there. If you notice that the strategies above aren’t working after a period of time, reach out to your child’s health professional to discern whether or not they need something more for their sleep. You got this!